Friday, August 18, 2006

weekend is here..

I know that I need to get out of this place when…

that flock of sheep that I see on my way to uni no longer reminds me of pastoral painting image.. I used to say “wahhhh.. sheeeeeps” .. but now it turned to “urghhhh.. smelly sheeps!”

the green meadows seem a little too green.. irritatingly green

the nude branches and twigs no longer amaze me with their charming shapes and formations, the architectural wonders of nature.. now they remind me of skeletons and scary movies..


***


Now I really need to go somewhere I can breathe some salty sea breeze. I wanna see the blue sea and blue sky.

I'm gonna hit the road in a few hours.

You have a good weekend. Take care everyone.

Tata.

Thursday, August 17, 2006

the prayer

Thanks for the comments in my previous post. I know you people care, but trust me, I don't feel bad being single. I don't really feel the stress of being single at my age. I love my life. Some people hate the cepumas question. Well, I don't. If you want to ask me that question, I wont mind. Just that I don't have the answer. I believe that God has His plans.

Do I pray for that? Yes, I do, sometimes. But my prayer is different when it comes to that matter. I do ask God to give me a clear mind to help me with my studies, I ask God to give health and bless the people I love. I ask for other things straight. But when it comes to THE MAN, my prayer goes like this;

"IF meeting the man (and getting married to him) will;
- drive me closer to you God,
- make me a better person
- make me happier
then lead my way to him. But IF things would turn the opposite way, I am happy to be just the way I am. It is okay if I don't get him at all."

That prayer always starts with IF. Now tell me, is it wrong to give conditions when you pray for something?

Saturday, August 12, 2006

do you need a man?

You Don't Need a Man ... or Want One!

Generally, you're very happy being a single woman.
And anyone who has a problem with that... well, that's there problem.
Not that you wouldn't share your life with the almost perfect guy.
You simply won't settle though. Your life is too good to share with some substandard man!


I came across this quiz in some blogs when I bloghopped and decided to give it a try. Aiyakk... why got result like this aa? Cannot la.. who said I don't want one. I want babies (yes, plural!), so one day I still need a man lah to help me make babies!

You can propagate the real ubisetela a.k.a kumara a.k.a sweet potato vegetatively with the sprouts that grow off the sweet potato, but not for this human version of Ubisetela. Saya manusia juga, bukan organisma unisel seperti amoeba atau paramecium yang boleh buat belahan dedua untuk menghasilkan sel anak. You see Mr.Tan Hock Ann, although I slept throughout most of your Bio classes, I can still remember some Biology facts, I'm so clever! Ok, I digress. My real point is.. I still want a man! Ok, may be not now.. later, k.

Monday, August 07, 2006

over there, here & somewhere

Over there,
Ayah is doing good and he's back at home with his hand in cast. Alhamdulillah. Thank you for all the well wishes & prayers. To tell you the truth I prefer to have him at the hospital rather than at home, knowing Ayah, even in the hospital he can go to almost all floors visiting friends & sedara mara in the wards (and left his handphone on his bed and all my calls unanswered), ape lagi kalau dia balik rumah. I'm not surprised if one of these days he'll be up on his bike again altho having one hand in cast. It is not easy to ask a 73 year old healthy man to sit still and do nothing. Mak will have to nag a lot these days.

My aunt still in the hospital, doc said she has 50-50 chance but everything is in the hands of God. The hospital becomes 2nd home for my little cousins. They refuse to stay home with the other aunties. They go to school and back to hospital again. If possible they don't even want to leave their mother for a single second.

Here,
Riuh juga berita menteri luar negara ini sakit setelah pulang dari persidangan di KL. Khabarnya digigit 'sesuatu' sampai beliau jatuh sakit yang agak berat, hingga digelar 'penyakit misteri' (misteri sangatkah?), sampai terpaksa dikuarantin. Bila ditemuramah setelah beliau sihat, beliau cuma berkata bahawa beliau digigit 'sesuatu' dikaki dan terkena virus, entah apa agaknya 'sesuatu' yang membawa 'virus' itu. Digigit nyamuk aedeskah?

Weekend was fun but a bit tiring. I was 'unconscious' (read: tak sedar diri) for pushing myself too hard trying to keep up with the young girls on the netball court during our netball tournament. My joints and muscles had a big shock, I’ve been inactive for too long. As the result, I had to jalan slowly like orang dalam pantang. Jadi ayu & sopan santun jalan pelan-pelan! I could not sit down or get up without the ‘adussss’ sound effect.

With the aching muscles and butts, I went to Hoyts later at night to watch the Lake House. Almost doze off half way through. I didn't blame the movie, I was very tired and sleepy- not really in a romantic mood. I did not click with the story and I have one comment to make: I think most main characters in love stories are selfish. What makes them think that just because they are so much in love it is okay for them to hurt others in their lives. One second you hold the hand of someone who cares for you, and the next minute you run away for ‘the love of your life’. Can you really find happiness that way?

Somewhere...
in dreamland I met you. I woke up wondering why you’re back in my dreams again. How did you find your way there? Did I call you in my sleep? Please, if you ever hear me calling, do not come. Just ignore me. I don’t want to see you ever again. Not in my dreams, not in reality, not in this lifetime.

Friday, August 04, 2006

keliru

I'm posting in my bahasa ibunda today.

Otakku tidak mahu berehat malam ini. Sudah puas mata ini kupejam tapi masih juga tak mahu tidur. Fikiran sudah melayang merentas 7 benua. Dalam kesunyian malam, dapat kudengar bunyi itu dengan jelas. Keroncong ada, hip hop pun ada. Bunyi apa? bunyi perut mintak diisi. Padanlah.. kali terakhir makan tepat jam 7 tadi dan kini sudahpun 7 jam berlalu.

Lantasku bangun ke dapur. Jerang air. Nak makan apa ya? Roti masih banyak, tapi dah bosan nak makan roti bakar dengan majerin dan madu. Mee segera Yoodle masih banyak lagi. Nasib baik masih ada cendawan dan telur di peti sejuk. Boleh jadi penambah perisa. Tekakku memang mengada-ngada. Kalau mee segera kosong tak ditambah apa-apa, susah benar nak menelan.

Berbekal semangkuk mee segera bercendawan & telur dan secawan teh lemon, kududuk menghadap peti tv di dapur. BBC News sedang ke udara. Selepas itu terus menonton BBC Hard Talk. Isunya Isr@el dan Lubn@n. Tetamu perbincangan adalah dua pelajar di UK, seorang dari Lubn@n dan seorang dari Isr@el. Menonton perbincangan itu, kuteringat dilema yang aku sendiri alami.

Semenjak dua menjak ini bila terbaca kisah Lubn@n
, hati pilu, sedih, marah dengan kekejaman Isr@el. Aku juga mengutuk kekejaman Y@hudi. Tapi bila aku berjumpa dengan rakanku yang seorang itu, aku jadi keliru. Dia rakan yang baik dan kukenali seluruh keluarganya. Aku tau dia juga sebahagian dari 'tentera' Isr@el kerana dia juga pernah mengikuti khidmat negara di negara tanah tumpahnya itu. Dia sendiri menceritakannya padaku. Walaupun dia turut mengkritik dasar negaranya sendiri, dia tetap pulang berkhidmat untuk negaranya dari semasa ke semasa. Maka andainya dia dikehendaki pulang bila-bila masa kenegaranya untuk berperang dengan Lubn@n, dia juga akan menjadi sebahagian dari tenaga pemusnah itu.

Disaat aku bertemunya tempoh hari, tiba-tiba wajah-wajah penderitaan di Lubn@n terlintas kemataku. Terdetik perasaan marah padanya. Tapi masih kubendung. Adilkah aku turut menyalahkan dia atas apa yang berlaku di sana?
Keliru.
Sememangnya aku keliru.